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The strangest mood killers: things to definitely NOT say in bed!

Internet - There are phrases that turn up the heat in the bedroom immediately and then there are things that no one wants to hear during sex. On Reddit, some users talked about their worst turn-offs.

It doesn't take a lot to ruin the fun of sex (stock image).
It doesn't take a lot to ruin the fun of sex (stock image).  © 123RF/Vasyl Dolmatov

There is a thin line between sexy and uncomfortable. While dirty talk add some spice to your love life, it can also lead to an awkward silence that spells the end of sexy time before it even had a chance to start.

User OMW2FYB1994 challenged the Reddit community to share their craziest stories.

And it didn't take long for the first users to unload:

  • One user recalled how a partner announced he was going to ejaculate inside her "and then [they] can go get plan b". Excuse me? Plan B is for emergencies only and not a contraceptive. And besides, it should never be included in dirty talk.

  • Another user wrote about his partner bursting into tears because she hadn't brought him to orgasm fast enough. With tears streaming down her face, she asked him if she was too ugly. It took less than five minutes to produce this meltdown, which made sure no one would be having an orgasm that night.

  • One woman was told she looked better than her partner had expected her to, the very definition of a backhanded compliment that won't get you very far in bed.

  • Secret fantasies probably shouldn't be divulged in the heat of the moment. One user didn't appreciate her partner mentioning her best friend while they were in the middle of doing the deed.

This last user was met with a lot of sympathy in the comments and everyone was glad to hear the partner in question was now an ex.

Always keep the name in mind

"Keep making the mac n cheese sound!" Users recall their craziest sex stories (stock image).
"Keep making the mac n cheese sound!" Users recall their craziest sex stories (stock image).  © 123RF/TORWAI Suebsri

Not having a way with words is one thing, but surely remembering your partner's name isn't too much to expect? 

  • One user recounted the story of his girlfriend moaning "Andy" in bed. Too bad that wasn't his name.

  • Another user went one better. He got called Ken during sex. That must have been bad enough on its own, as it isn't his name. But it's much worse than that! Apparently, Ken was "her dads name".

These days, most users are able to laugh at such slip-ups. Many are still in a relationship with the culprits, others however remember the incidents with horror. 

In any case, some lessons were hopefully learned.

Cover photo: 123RF/Vasyl Dolmatov

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